We take a few swigs from the ever-reliable plonk that is French rugby newspaper Midi Olympique. This week, Brive edge closer to the drop, Racing make a play for Paris and coaches Galthié and Gajan threaten the very fabric of the game

Brive face crucial five-pointer

Brive's slump into the relegation battle could get even worse next month when the club faces a meeting with French rugby's financial watchdogs the DNACG over an alleged €1m shortfall in their accounts.

According to Midi Olympique, the club is facing a five-point deduction when it meets the DNACG on December 16 - a similar penalty was meted out to Pro D2 side Mont-de-Marsan last season in similar circumstances.

As it stands, a five point deduction would put Brive into 13th place, one point behind Agen. The two meet in a right old relegation eight-pointer in the next round of Top 14 matches on December 4.

Montpellier's strength-in-depth charge

Montpellier felt the wrath of European despots ERC, copping a €5000 fine for fielding a below-strength squad in the second-string Amlin Cup.

Coach Fabien Galthié opted to leave international trio Francois Trinh-Duc, Fulgence Ouedraogo and Julien Tomas out of the 35-man squad for the competition.

As a result, the powers that be claimed that the club had breached the competition's rules by failing to include their best players, and held them up to a charge of misconduct.

Ironically les Heraultais, currently second in the Top 14 after nine wins from 12 games, had won their opening Amlin matches at Exeter and at home to Newcastle.

Over the years, French clubs have rarely sent out their best teams in the second-tier competition, and while Galthié had already declared the competition "an opportunity for players who don't have much match time under their belts to play", ERC clearly decided that it was time for action, and everyone had a jolly good day or two in Dublin to boot.

Gajan infraction

Bayonne coach Christian Gajan is also €5000 lighter after his own meeting with the ERC. Gajan was cited for comments made after the Basques' 16-13 Amlin Cup defeat to Connacht last month.

Gajan, who has already had to serve a two-week touchline ban after insulting match officials during a Top 14 match in Toulon earlier this season, was fined €12,500, with €7500 suspended until June 2012, for being "inappropriately critical of ERC, the tournament, the match officials and the sport of rugby union". Yes, really.

We can't find any report of exactly what he said, and in fact weassume and hope that every scrap of evidence has been encased in concrete and thrown in the Liffey lest the sky fall in on all our heads.

Actually the full report on the hearing should be out later this month, at which point Bayonne and Saracens, whose own coach Brendan Venter was fined €25,000 for making similar comments, may decide to appeal.

It's Toulouse! Run!

Not content with stealing Stade Francais' spot at Paris's number-one team and European representatives, Racing-Metro will attempt an assault on the Stade de France when they host Toulouse at the 80,000-seater arena at the end of March. It will be the Franciliens' first delocalisation at the country's biggest stadium.

Agen, too, are planning to upgrade for the visit of the European champions, hosting the Top 14 match on December 29 at the 35,000-capacity Stade Chaban-Delmas in Bordeaux. But while the accounts department have euro signs in their eyes, club manager Christian Lanta would rather Agen's most fierce local derby was played at the own 13,000 Stade Armandie cauldron.

Toulouse seem to have this effect on teams - Castres played their home tie with the French Rugby Aristocrats at Beziers, Stade Francais look certain to host their visit at Stade de France in January, while Perpignan have looked into hosting the teams' April meeting in Barcelona's Nou Camp.

From Pau to poetry

Marc Lievremont's French squad will have extra motivation during the Six Nations as the national coach has invited a rugby poet to join the team at their Marcoussis training camp.

Jean-Michel Agest, a former Pau and France A outside-half, hung up his boots in 1985, picked up a pen and turned his hand to rugby rhyme. From there he widened his repertoire with verses on football, tennis and handball.

Agest met up with Lievremont in Biarritz earlier this year, and the French coach invited him to spend three days with the squad in the run-up to one of next year's Six Nations games. He will regail the squad with verses on village rugby, Serge Blanco and Laurent Cabannes, and perhaps author some new lines on the Grand Slam winners. If only he can find a rhyme for Trinh-Duc...